Why write anonymously?

 

All of us have this longing within to make a difference in this life. We yearn for our gifts, talents, and abilities to reach their highest level of accomplishment. This desire we have is pure and our aspirations are virtuous. 

However, typically, the process by which we achieve this desire is thus: 

We begin creating and bringing into the world our gift, craft, or our art. People are formed and find meaning in what we provide and our impact grows. As awareness of our unique artistry multiples, so does the extent of our contributions, as well as our circle of influence. These become broader and our distinctive abilities flourish as acclaim swells and our popularity gains momentum.

As we allow our art to flower and are encouraged by those who also bloom as a result of our unfolding, we naturally begin spending as much time on growing our art as we do in creating it. We expend more and more of our energy on widening, and lengthening, and deepening the proliferation of the message our art conveys. This translates to more followers . . . more opportunities . . . notoriety . . . possibly a book or television show . . . people see or read us . . . we receive invitations to speak . . . so on and so forth. 

Until one day we awaken to find that our name, perhaps our face, have become the brand that promotes the product we now provide. We are followed and applauded and celebrated by loyal customers, who value and appreciate what we provide. As we take in our achievements, with unpretentious delight, we recognize we've made a difference in this one life we've been given to live. And with absolute honest acknowledgement, we're grateful that our gifts, talents, and abilities have reached their highest level of accomplishment. 

Although this is altogether customary and thoroughly honorable, at the end of the day this affirmation fails to impart the approval I so desperately seek within my soul. While Father can and does use this process, He is unrestrained by it. He does not require it. He does not use it as the measure by which he determines our significance. 

And to be completely honest, I've grown weary of all this, because it feels as if I'm focused more on building my own brand, or kingdom, than I am on allowing His Kingdom to burst forth within me in ways and directions that are beyond my control. I'm unable to manipulate what He chooses to do.

Furthermore, I am well acquainted with my tendencies. I enjoy manipulating the outcome of my endeavors, and the control I believe I have in doing so. I'm fond of success and relish being hailed as effective and valuable. In truth, I take great pleasure in the applause of people. I have a penchant for wrapping my identity around the accolades people shower over me, like bouquets of fresh flowers thrown onstage at the brilliant lead. I love it, too much. 

It is for this reason that I've chosen to write anonymously. 

It is for this reason that I write for the approval and applause of The One who matters most. 

If no one ever stumbles onto this unlinked page, contained within this unknown blog, I am convinced I will have made a difference in this life I've been given. Furthermore, I am confident that my gifts, and talents, and abilities will have reached their highest level of accomplishment. 

After all, one can't get any higher than where He sits and reads my art with absolute delight and sheer fascination. 

I write to You and You alone, and you know exactly who I am. 

This is why I write anonymously. 


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